I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Randomize
