make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
