New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
If I die, sorry about rent.
Randomize
