remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
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hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
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She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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