oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I need to align my fucking chakras
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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