On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize