I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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