Sry I called you an 8
hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
should my penis look like a turkey
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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