he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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