i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
