Dual....:-)
Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
