I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
