I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize