New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
