I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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