I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Randomize
