he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize