that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
