He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
