i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
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