I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize