yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
