I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
