I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
