where am i from again
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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