When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
