I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize
