i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?