I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
