Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
