I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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