he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
