I'm really into asian looking animals
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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