I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
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