Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
