Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
