I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
These tits shall not be calmed
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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