When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
So vagazzling was a success
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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