You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Randomize
