Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
