piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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