Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (361): View more from Texas

  Screwed.edu

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (361): Screwed.edu http://tfl.nu/m1ch
  Replies (7) Good night (897) Bad night (1318)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober http://tfl.nu/y1xh
  Replies (28) Good night (1230) Bad night (3999)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  FIrst one done

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  How did it go?

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): FIrst one done (609): How did it go? (440): I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c" http://tfl.nu/mm29
  Replies (9) Good night (3537) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (863): View more from Florida

  just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (863): just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud http://tfl.nu/54kw
  Replies (11) Good night (5044) Bad night (946)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend. http://tfl.nu/3lzx
  Replies (20) Good night (1132) Bad night (4391)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."

  (1-806): View more from Texas

  Best pick-up line ever!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (806): You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck." (1-806): Best pick-up line ever! http://tfl.nu/plrf
  Replies (35) Good night (10014) Bad night (1418)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular. http://tfl.nu/78s0
  Replies (6) Good night (1445) Bad night (3588)
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?" http://tfl.nu/agco
  Replies (10) Good night (947) Bad night (3624)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (250): there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady http://tfl.nu/zjtt
  Replies (5) Good night (994) Bad night (2495)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me http://tfl.nu/y5sm
  Replies (7) Good night (1340) Bad night (1657)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced

  (210): View more from Texas

  The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced (210): The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks http://tfl.nu/kwln
  Replies (6) Good night (1817) Bad night (795)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just can't deal with that sentence

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion (412): I just can't deal with that sentence http://tfl.nu/b4b0
  Replies (3) Good night (1842) Bad night (698)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman. http://tfl.nu/e6dh
  Replies (0) Good night (763) Bad night (381)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing. http://tfl.nu/u4qz
  Replies (2) Good night (1019) Bad night (331)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me http://tfl.nu/flmi
  Replies (4) Good night (700) Bad night (280)

Randomize