Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
