yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
