North Korea, Best Korea!
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
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ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
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We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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