ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize