This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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