I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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