remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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