his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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